A Shout Out For Country First!!!

Seems the McCain theme is "Country First". That's Great! I have been spending the last few months in the exact same endeavor. If you don't normally read my blog, that makes you a) visitor 31 today and b) unaware of my pledge to spend all of my discretionary dollars on products that are Made In America. Yay!!!

You know, Barack Obama has not made a "Country First" pledge. But John McCain has! Doubtless this means that John McCain is doing all he can to buy American products. I bet his family does too. Let's check on Cindy.

Cindy is NOT an elitist even though she claims with a straight face that one cannot get around that big bumpy windy forested state of Arizona by Prius-try as you might. No, all Arizonans get about by means of private jet. That state rocks!!! I am so moving there once I figure out how to fly. 'Cause the lessons and the gas for learnin' are free too!!!

Cindy's outfit for her little fund-raising-not-mentioning-George-Bush-or-what-she-was doing-when-Katrina-struck-not-drugs-kay?-so-fuck-you-libbie speech at the RNC with Laura-my-cheeks-hurt-from-smilin'-so-wicked-I-WILL-go-to rehab!! while not being elitist cost approximately 1/3 more than my house. Here's the math: My house= $200,000. Cindy's outfit= $300,000. I'm sure that if I lose my house the McCain's will feel my pain. It'd be almost like Cindy accidently forgot those diamond earrings on the desk in the suite at the Marriot. Fuck! I hate when that happens. Then again, they have insurance for stupid bonehead moves like that, all I have is a personal sense of dropping out of that promising "ownership society". Crap.

You know there is a figure given by one of my 'buy America first' sources that says that if all American households shifted $20 of their discretionary dollars away from a product made overseas to a product made in America, we would create 5,ooo,ooo new jobs. Imagine that! Criminy, if Cindy's outfit was domestic there'd be 4 people who'd have pensions and kids headed for college. On one outfit! Really don't you think we ought to elect them? By that math, every day the McCain's are in office 4 new jobs are created just so the crypt keeper can drape herself in jewels and chintz. That's economy and if you don't think so, then you're just anti....well, anti something. It'll come to me.

Ok. It's next to impossible to discern whether McCain's tour bus is an American product or if it is imported. If you know let ME know. Thanks.

Also, could you please find out where those McCain T-shirts are coming from? Doubtless they are Union Made USA worker products, hell we probably don't even need to check. But if you can, would you? Thanks, you're a dear.

Cindy McCain: "The Pills Made Me Feel Euphoric and Free"

Just Say No is apparently only for people of color and kids. Wealthy heiresses? Pass the scrip baby!


The Rude Pundit shares a bit of the story of Cindy's drug use. Cliffnotes version: it was John's Keating Five scandal's fault.

"[M]y pain was more than just physical. The Keating Five savings and loan scandal had just blown up, and my husband was implicated. (I became a focus of the investigation when I couldn't find receipts showing that John and I had reimbursed the Keatings for a vacation we took to the Bahamas.) The first time I ever heard of the Keating Five, I was in the hospital, recovering from my first back surgery. A resident came in, threw a newspaper down on my bed and said, 'Gee, I guess your husband's not so perfect after all.' Throughout the investigation, the painkillers cushioned me. The newspaper articles didn't hurt as much, and I didn't hurt as much. I can remember sitting in the Senate hearings, listening to Howell Heflin saying terrible things not just about my husband but about me. The pills made me feel euphoric and free."

Jesus, imagine if she had a really shitty life. You know, like only having three houses!