Stranger Than Science Fiction

Dr. Zaius was attacked by an Assassin....bug.

Simian Hearts

Didn't they toss around the idea of transplanting baboon hearts a few years ago? I only know two simians, and it seems neither one of them has a ticker that's worth a damn. Yesterday we discussed Dr. Z's undertheweatherhood. Today we learn that Dr. Monkey von Monkerstein is going to have some balloon art done on his heart. I googled your surgeon, Dr. MvM. Seems he graduated from Granada Medical College. No, I did not misstype, he wasn't good enough to get into Grenada. Your surgeon has links to the old ford model somehow. Here's a photog of him practicing his "medicine" that I found on the webs:


So, good luck to you, ya big monkey. I'm sending you this bouquet of flowers. I hope you luv it because it cost me really big bucks. Be sure to suck out all the helium and talk funny to Sparky. Maybe right after the procedure so that she thinks you are permanently altered. Ha!

For Dr. Zaius - Who Eagerly Awaits Global Warming

Dr. Zaius is feeling a little under the weather. He comes from 1,971 years hence - post global warming apocalypse doncha know. All this snow and cold is just hard on an orangutan's system. Recently I had my own little rough patch and Dr. Z cheered me up by reminding me that no matter how bad you've got it, others are doing much better!

So, knowing that the last thing you need when you are suffering is to listen to others bitch I post the following:



If that was too uplifting, here are the children to help you:



Disclaimer: These videos represent the opinions of the artists presented herein. They do not necessarily reflect the opinion of the management at I Was Just Wondering. Particularly the bit about Santa.

You can send get well greetings to Dr. Zaius here.

Have a nice day!

For Dr. Zaius

Evil spock turned me on to the joys of the Threadless Tee. If I knew Dr. Zaius' address I would send him this one. While I know that regular parcel post can be slow, I don't think it is 1,971 years slow.

A Must Read by Dr. Zaius

I have wanted to sit down and pound my keyboard over the outrage of Bush knowing that Iran halted its nuclear program four years ago, while still beating the drums of war with the oogey boogey mushroom cloud, but I haven't had the time.

Dr. Zaius raises an excellent point about the whole sad sorry sordid deal. Please go read.

Update: Speaking in Omaha earlier today, Bush called on Iran to better explain its nuclear intentions or face further sanctions. How bizarre can you get? Iran claims to not pursue nukes, turns out that's the truth, Bush is caught lying about it so the only obvious resolution is to continue the call for sanctions? On them?

Bullshit. This is about oil, pure and simple. Iran can easily form a strategic alliance with Russia and then China for the 200 billion barrels of oil in the Caspian region.